23 Jul Make your mind up – Decisions and Commitment

DECISION MAKING

 

Sometimes in life we know what we want and we know what we need to do to get there.

However, as many of us are probably aware, it takes more than just ‘knowing’ to actually achieve our goals.

You’ve got to make a decision. Decide what your life is going to look like in 6 months, in 1 year. in 3 years and even in 10 years.

1.Visualise it 

Imagine yourself doing the tasks and performing the daily habits that you need to achieve the things that you dream about. Imagine yourself living the lifestyle that you want, creating the impact that you want to create.

Does it feel scary? Good. It should! If it wasn’t, you might not be thinking big enough.

It seems scary because it’s different. When we imagine ourselves doing something different, our brain creates a fear response. It does that to keep us safe (were the need for the 5 seconds rule, we will talk about this in a future blog).

However, that feeling is not real fear. It’s simply a signal to let us know that we are thinking outside of our comfort zone.

If you never venture outside of your comfort zone, you will never grow as a person and you certainly won’t be able to create any kind of useful impact on the lives of others.

 

So, our advice is this: when you get that fear signal from your brain, firstly remind yourself that it is ok. You are thinking differently and your brain will need a bit of time to adjust.  Don’t try to fight it, accept it and understand it.

Once you have made a decision about what you want your life to look like, we recommend writing it down.

2. Start by making a list of your goals.

Here are some examples:

– I am wealthy, therefore, I am an expert when handling my finances

– I am happily married, we are building an amazing marriage

– I am what I eat. therefore, I eat healthily

Notice that when you are writing your goals, you are writing them in the PRESENT tense, as if you have already achieved them. Why is this?

There are a few reasons: It helps you to commit to your decision. It’s not something you ‘will do’, this implies you’ll get to it when you can, which will be never! Instead it implies and reminds yourself that this is something you are already doing. You have committed to this and the work for it has started and will continue. And also, there is power in the “I AM”. There is a connection between you and the source within you when you say the I AM, that is why it’s very important to have the daily affirmation every morning as part of a morning routine.

Another reason is that we usually become what we believe ourselves to be. I will not say it enough, “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he”.

As children, depending on our parenting, we will have been told different things. Some of us would have had parents who told us we could do anything and that we are capable of anything. Some of us, unfortunately, would have had parents who told us the opposite, that we are not capable, we are not smart and unable to achieve the things we want. Alongside this, many of us are actually taught by society to aim low, to be mediocre instead of aiming for great things. Often we are taught it’s better to play it safe and not fail instead of thinking bigger and risking failure.

All of these influences can play a large part in what we believe about ourselves and our capabilities. Thus when it comes to making decisions about our lives and what is achievable it helps to retrain our thinking and re program what we believe about ourselves. One way to do this is to write down our goals, regularly, as if we have already achieved them.

3. The next stage is to commit.

So, by now you have made a decision. You have got to follow it through, no matter how hard things become.

Without commitment you will lose motivation at the first sign of difficulty.

So how do you stay committed?

Visualising and writing your goals twice a day will help massively.

There are also a few other things that you can do:

Break your goals down into mini goals or steps. If your brain thinks there is loads to do that fear signal will get bigger and you will most likely spend your days oversleeping and over eating as a way to comfort yourself.

Trick your brain by giving yourself small, enjoyable tasks to do each week that will move your further to your goal.

For example if you want to lose weight, you don’t need to overhaul your diet, go to the gym 5 times and start weighing yourself all in one go. Start by simply adding in more fruits that you enjoy eating  into your diet.

This way you are starting with something enjoyable, it won’t scare your brain and over time you feel healthier and then feel encouraged to take a second step.

4. Look for an accountability partner 

Work with someone you trust and who has the same mindset as you. This can be your spouse or family member, a good friend (sometimes this works best because you are not emotionally attached), join a group or network of like minded individuals.

Whoever you choose, it works best if you both have a goal that you are working towards – it doesn’t need to be the same goal, but it helps if the level of effort is similar.

Set mini goals with each other, for example, if you are writing a book how many words do you need to write each week?

If you are starting a business, how many customers do you need in your first month?

When you have set these goals, hold each other accountable.

You can also take it a step further and have a small penalty if you haven’t achieved what you said you would, for example a £5 fine, or extra pushups at the gym.

 

We hope that has helped you understand what may be lacking in your plan to achieve your dream life and to build an amazing legacy. Remember we are only a phone call away if you are struggling with anything and would love to help you. So please do get in touch – don’t be shy, we all have our struggles and we can only build greatness together.

Your sister in transformation,

Natalie